Condolence: Eulogy for David Wayne Rovner (1949-2014)

On TV there is a program called “Survivor”. On the show it is a big deal to eat a bug and outlast the rest of the people playing the game. I got stuck watching this once and so I ask the question, if these people are survivors, then what word could possibly describe a person that:
• Had seizures and a hemorrhage caused by an arterial venous malformation in the brain; the eventual surgery to correct this issue after many embolization procedures: and requiring 28 pints of blood on the operating table due to another hemorrhage.
• Needed Cardiac surgery to correct many heart defects (but loving others was not one of them).
• Having kidney cancer which required a kidney to be removed in Aug of 2014
The only thing you could call the person that dealt with the above medical conditions and more would be ---my brother David Wayne Rovner. To define David only by his conditions would be a disservice to the man. Yes he endured his medical issues, but those are not the whole picture of who he was. We could have lost him but instead we got the gift of his time with us for so many more years.

The best way to describe David would be by bringing up the great loves of his life: They would be (in no particular order):
• The Yankees Especially when they win
• Big Band music and the Trumpet, along with records of Sinatra and Streisand and other too.
• Movies and Movie Posters, especially the ones with Boris and Bella (and Lon too)
• TV and other Nostalgia (including BARNEY MILLER his favorite show)
• Abbott and Costello, who you could make a strong case that they should be first on this list
• His children Jessica and Michael who did laugh at his jokes (corny as they might have been)
• His extended family who have been in his corner no matter what (a very crowded corner indeed)
• His friends who are family by definition if not by biology
• His partner for over 35 years, my sister-in law Arlene. If I start on the best of Arlene we will need some pizzas delivered as this could take a while
David and I were 11 years apart. This was not by design, as there were 3 misses in-between. The Family said I was too stubborn not to show up. I say that I was waiting for Saturday Morning Cartoons to be perfected before coming. David had to wait for his brother and he had a hand in naming me. The family needed a name that started with an “L”. We already had a Lennie, Louis and Larry in the family, so David being the monster movie fan suggested “Lon” for Lon Chaney. Mom liked the nickname “Lonnie” and so I was named thanks to my brother after the “WOLFMAN”. If this didn’t start off a great relationship, then what could?



At first I was the tag along who tried to keep up with his “big brother”, which is also a reality show name. Are we sensing a pattern here? As the years passed and we both dealt with family medical and other issues, the years melted and we were more than brothers, we were friends too.
David’s was the great American story as we tell people-A Jewish boy who goes to a Catholic university and teaches music for seven years in the Lutheran schools on Chicago’s Northside. He had his students learn the lessons of music and many went on to continue to play beyond their school years. One of the most important lessons these students learned from MR. ROVNER was how he took his coffee and they had it ready for him. Who knows one of these kids may be a barista today at Starbucks.
David used the skills he developed selling a music program to be a salesman for copiers and government information. I was proud of his accomplishments in the sales field, but I wish he did not have to trade in the 75 Olds Cutlass which was by far my favorite car of his (an 8 cylinder black car). It was so much better that the Gremlin of which he traded it in for. The day of the trade, the Gremlin did not start. He called me over to help and we did get it started. I held down the gas pedal from the passenger seat so it would not shut off while he went to the 3rd floor to get his title. We got the Gremlin to the dealer and drove off in the Olds not knowing if that AMC car ever started again. Having a brother with a car was the start of many adventures for the two of us. We went places while the 8 track played out the windows.
The question arose as I was writing this as to what was his favorite song? I could not give a definitive answer, but I have 5 suggestions of which you may agree upon or not:
1. NEW YORK NEW YORK by the Chairman of the Board: I think that this might have been his favorite as it was played when the Yanks won (the Liza version is played when they lost – look it up); it represented Dad’s side of the family and a memorable vacation he took there as a teen for the World’s Fair in 1965.
2. BOOGIE WOOGIE BUGLE BOY : Some reasons for this one might be that it was by the Andrew Sisters from the Abbott and Costello classic film Buck Privates; the song was about a horn player and in the 70’s it was covered by Bette Midler who David saw at Mr. Kelly’s and had her 8 tracks and LP’s. That performance also featured Barry Manilow before he was a star.
3. STARTING HERE STARTING NOW: By Barbara Streisand – their wedding song-nuff said
4. AS TIME GOES BY: from Casablanca; from an all-time favorite film of David’s, although it was never shown as part of Creature Features or on Svengoolie or on Family Classics.
5. THEME FROM SUMMER OF 42: a Michelle Legrand song that David arranged as part of a medley that he played with the BJB, a jazz band on Sunday afternoons in the mid-70s. I was the cover collector and band boy for the band.
 

David introduced me to Arlene when she visited him during one of the times he was at the hospital. Soon we were all trading off Honeymooner lines and we all knew that she was a keeper. Soon we were breaking bread with Helen, Ray and family, plus Lucky the dog. I told him that if he married Arlene he’d get Lucky which he did (but not the dog)
1979 was an important year for David and Arlene. In July, the Rovner and Zwiefelhofer clans met in a banquet hall as they exchanged vows. More important that day it was confirmed that I was indeed the “BEST MAN”, not that there was any doubt. This union would produce two great children, Jessica and Michael and create a welcoming household that would be the site for many special occasions and family gatherings. Ask some fathers about their kids and you get a story or two. With David, you’d get to see press clippings, awards and YouTube videos. I think that he and Arlene did a good job with them (along with their grandparents, aunts and uncles too)

Not that David’s other union was not a great one. Of course I’m referring to the Musician’s union, which was a great part of his career as a Trumpet player. Many a married couple can be traced to his double high C notes and song knowledge of many ethnic groups at their nuptials. Many tales can be told of the De Paul concerts, small groups he played with (including the Lavender Pond) and being in the pit for many theater productions, including being on stage as the Cornet Man in a production of Funny Girl.

There are many stories which can be told about these “gigs” but those would keep us here into extra innings. Ask to hear a story about David the musician when you talk to his friend Chip or of David the music lover when you talk to any of the members of the Brookfield Jazz society that David was so fond of in recent times. Ask to hear stories about David’s school days when you speak to Sherwin or Cary. Ask me about embarrassing stories about his hair care habits and other dirt that only a brother can tell you. Ask any one about David, especially Rich, Mauritta or Kathy, and for sure there will be an immediate smile and a story or two or a hundred.
In the past years, I’ve been composing many letters as memorials and last year a eulogy for our mother who left us at 89. In these tributes, I’ve made mention that perhaps my dad would be having a cold one with the departed or in the case of Mom a piece of cake. In the case of my brother David, while I’m sure that Dad will be buying the first round, and Mom will be offering him some tiramisu, I think all of that will have to wait until he gets to “take 5”. I think that Maynard Ferguson or Harry James must have needed a new first chair horn player and called for David and his mouthpiece. The best tribute you can make to David would be to say thanks to the musicians and others who are part of the soundtrack of your life. I know that I’ll be hearing lots of notes from that “young man with a horn” for the rest of my days.